(c) Chris Green - All Rights reserved
http://www.conqueringstress.com
One of the most frequently asked questions I get asked
is "When it comes to
stress, anxiety and depression, what
helps?"
For many sufferers, a feeling of helplessness underpins stress,
anxiety and
depression and I touched upon this briefly in a
recent article about how beliefs can
exacerbate the suffering.
Helplessness is a major part of stress, anxiety and depression
so let's
look at how
you can reduce the impact this flawed
belief
has to help relieve the suffering.
Believing you are helpless in life is a truly terrible
feeling and I write from personal
experience here. For five
years, a number of traumatic events led me to the point
where I believed life held nothing but pain and anguish. I
truly believed life would
unfold in a way that would destroy
me and there wasn't a single thing I could do
about it.
Perhaps you've felt this way too?
The underlying belief is the important factor here. It is a
firm belief that life is
something that happens to you and
you have NO CONTROL over anything. In
short, you are a
powerless, passive recipient for whatever life decides to
throw
at you.
It is an awful state to be in. Furthermore, this belief
simply isn't true.
Let me give an example. Say you and your partner split up.
Now, this can be one
very traumatic experience, I've been
through it, so have many others. You react
in a highly
negative and emotionally arousing way:
"I'm devastated. He/she was my whole world and now my world
has fallen apart.
Everything I do in life always goes wrong
and this is another disaster. I'll never
be happy again."
Wow. It's a powerful reaction isn't it? I'm sure you, like
me, have either reacted
this way to an event or you've heard
someone react this way. It is a very damaging
way to assign
a meaning to an event you are confronted with.
The last two sentences reveal the belief in helplessness.
The key words are:
Everything always goes wrong and never be
happy again. When you react in such
a way, you are telling
yourself that you are helpless because nothing has ever gone
right for you and you'll never be happy no matter what.
You're saying you cannot
control anything and therefore, you
truly believe you're helpless.
How do you think you'll feel when you react like this?
Exactly. You'll feel deeply
unhappy, confused, frustrated
and of course, helpless to change your life. Why would
you
feel anything else? Everything ALWAYS goes wrong and you'll
NEVER be happy
again so what's the point of doing anything
to create change?
Do you see how helplessness works? But it simply isn't true.
Of course, there are
many things in life that are entirely
beyond your control. Other people and Mother
Nature to name
but two. There are things in life you have some control over
- where
you live and work for example. It is important to
keep these facts about control
firmly in mind.
Here's the most important fact about helplessness: There is
one thing you have full
control over in your life and that
is how you react and assign meanings to everything
you are
confronted with. In the example above, a better reaction
would be:
"OK, my relationship hasn't worked but other things in my
life are going well and I'll concentrate on them for a while
as I come to terms with what's happened. Just
because this
relationship hasn't worked out, it doesn't mean future
relationships will
fail and once I've got over this, I'll
get out there and find someone better."
See the difference? You're keeping control by assigning a
less emotional meaning, a
meaning more in keeping with
reality. You're acknowledging that you're hurting, but
that
this is temporary and when you're ready, you'll try again.
You know you have
other things in your life that you can
concentrate on and reacting this way to events
you are faced
with helps to reduce stress, anxiety and depression because it
prevents
a feeling of
helplessness arising.
See you soon.
Click Here Now to get started right away on
kicking stress, depression and anxiety out of your life forever
so you can enjoy a brighter, happier future!
*** Resource Box ***
For more tips, information and articles about what helps to
relieve
stress, anxiety and depression
QUICKLY and without taking drugs,
please click here ==>
http://www.conqueringstress.com
** Attn Ezine editors / Site owners **
Feel free to reprint this article in its entirety
in your ezine or on your site so long as you leave
all links in place, do not modify the content and
include our resource box as listed above.
Feel free to substitute your affiliate link in place of
our link in the resource box.
Earn up to 60% on every purchaser you refer!
Affiliate details are available here:
http://www.conqueringstress.com/retailerinf.html
If you do use an article please send us a note
so we can take a look. Thank you.
